Menyampaikan dalam masa yang sama tuju pada diri sendiri. Aku juga pendosa.

Sunday, July 1, 2018

PILIHAN WARNA DAN CORAK.

Assalamualaikum. Long-time no see huh? huhu

Okay saya nak menggunakan Bahasa Melayu sepenuhnya. Harap berjaya huhu.

Dulu kan kita selalu dengar orang cakap malah cikgu-cikgu kita pun ada cakap, anak kecil ini bagaikan kain putih. Suci. Masa kita kecil apa lah sangat kita tahu. Kita sangat suci. Terutamanya masa kita bayi lagi. Kalau sedara mara datang mestilah diaorang cakap comelnya, sucinya muka dan lain-lain. Bagaikan kain putih. Tiada siapa yang mencorakkannya atau yang mewarnakannya lagi. Memang putih seputihnya. Bersih dan suci. 

Bila kita bayi dan masih kanak-kanak tidak banyak perkara yang kita lalui. Malah bila A yang disuruh maka A juga lah yang dibuat. Bila B yang dilarang maka B itu juga tidak akan dibuat. Kita mendapat didikan daripada keluarga untuk melakukan perkara yang baik-baik serta pendidikan di sekolah untuk mengetahui halal haram. 

Proses tumbesaran manusia daripada bayi, kanak-kanak, remaja, dewasa dan orang tua. Setiap kali berlaku proses tumbesara tersebut maka setiap kali itulah kain putih yang sebelum ini putih tanpa corak dan warna telah hilang keputihannya.

Tambahan lagi, apabila meningkat dewasa kain putih yang sebelum ini menjadi putih telah bercorak dan bewarna dengan pelbagai warna atas pilihan kita. Setiap pilihan dan perbuatan yang kita buat itulah yang mewarnkan dan mencorakkan kain putih itu. Secantik manakah pilihan corak dan warna yang kita telah buat? Semua orang tahu fitrah manusia adalah suka kan kecantikan dan keindahan. Hati kita akan gembira apabila kita melihat benda yang cantik lagi indah.Jadinya, adakah cantik dan indah kain putih yang kita corakkan dan warnakan atas pilihan kita? Atau bertukar menjadi kain yang buruk dan hodoh atas pilihan corak dan warna yang kita lakukan? 

Saturday, March 10, 2018

Need Some Space.

Heyy guys? what's up? I hope your life was grateful and full of happiness. My life was just suam suam kuku rasa hambar teruk and need time to make my life become more wonderful haha.

Am I worth for them? Am I good for them? Am I really bad? Am I don't deserve someone? Idk. But lately i had been think that i lack of everything. I feel liked I failed to make people love me like I love them. I failed to make they stay with me. I failed to make they appreciate me.

Kadang I rasa macam I dah buat banyak benda just to make them happy, to make them appreciate me but I just get hurt :') I know, maybe you guys rasa I overthinking, emotional yada yada okay it's fine. I accept that. But the think you must know is you're not in my shoes :) Look, I'm updating my blog back not because I want attention or sympathy from people (if they read my blog) but it's just the way I want to clear out my mind. Sometime you just need to write what you feel instead of talk to others because no one can exactly feel what you feel right now.

For those who read my blog (i guess no one will read it haha) I need some space. I really need space. I just want to be alone. Kalau ikutkan hati I nak tukar nombor, nak tutup all my social media yada yada but yeayy i will think about it. I feel so sick right now. My heart sick. But, don't worry I believe it's will be okay. Just need some time to heal. xoxo

Tuesday, March 6, 2018

What Are They For?

Hi, i had been think a lot this week and it's make me demotivated and stress. I feel so bored of what am I doing right now and wanna give up.

Then, I luah apa I rasa dekat kawan-kawan I, abang I instead of luah dekat family I. Bukan apa I taknak family I risau. Padahal bukan masalah besar pun. Diri sendiri macam emosi terlebih haha. Macam selalu.

I just want to share my point of view in certain things. I actually feel so grateful because had so many positive people in my life. I had good friends, good big brother, good seniors and others. Also, my family is kind of good and supportive one.

I realized that they always with me in any situation. Always give good words and opinion to me when i feel down. Even though thy were not around me but i still feel their presence. I had good friends either in kajang or batu pahat. These both place make me so comfortable and happy when hang out with my friends, lepak-ing, makan tak ingat dunia, macam-macam lagi lah. They also give me attention when i need that haha. Yeahh, what are friends for? Live with your friends right now is much more better rather than busy looking for right person. I mean yes we need someone to get married but then the question is how much we were ready? Enjoy your life first with your family and friends.

Last but not least, thank you guys. Thank you for all of your support. My heart still can heal well tho it hurts but my friends always at my back. Thank you so much! xoxo :)